Helicopter parents is a term being used to describe parents who protectively hover over their children. Psychologists are finding links between helicopter parenting and the development of depression, anxiety, and substance abuse in their children. Were your parents helicopter parents? Here are some signs:
Your Parents Were Always There
Not necessarily in an emotionally supportive way. You didn’t know your parents were around when you needed to seek them out. You knew they were around because they were always around. Helicopter parents are present for and involved in everything their child does. From sports to academics to friendships.
Your Parents Ate Your Homework
Hungry to help you succeed, your parents gobbled up your homework assignments for you. If you needed help with a math problem, they might have finished the times tables for you. Your science projects became their accomplishments and you felt like you couldn’t do anything on your own. Mostly, because they wouldn’t let you. Helicopter parents don’t give kids a chance to problem solve. As a result, you might have difficulty making decisions about things in your life like who you want to be or what job you want to do.
Your Parents Were BandAids
At least, they always had one ready. You didn’t fall from trees, because you weren’t allowed to try climbing them. Helicopter parents stay so close that their children can’t experience the autonomy in taking risks and learning the resiliency of bouncing back after getting hurt. You might find you are less willing to take on challenges, or don’t know how to cope with failure.
Your Parents Fought Your Battles
They argued with teachers, coaches, and judges at the talent show. Your performance was never enough to be evaluated as is. Your confidence suffered as a result, but that is what your parents truly intended to protect. You have to learn that it’s okay not to come in first all the time and that it doesn’t dictate who you are as a person.
Your Parents Didn’t Listen To You
You might have told them you wanted to wear green, but they assured you blue was the better color. You might have told them you wanted to go swimming, but they told you playing in the sand was more safe. You might have told them you wanted chicken nuggets for dinner, but vegetables were a more sensible choice. Whatever opinion you offered, you were rejected. Today you’re unsure if what you feel or desire is adequate or correct. You may keep silent and allow others to make decisions.
Healing trauma of the past is a key to healthy recovery in the present and the future. Refuge Recovery offers you a chance to redefine their lives through recovery. We empower people to become their best selves, one day at a time. For more information on programs of treatment for drug and alcohol addiction call 323-207-0276.